Sex Toys: They look delicious, but don't lick them...

God knows how the sex toy industry kept in business before the invention of the internet!

I mean, imagine having to go into one of those seedy sex shops to buy your jelly naughties? Or order them out of the back of some grotty wank mag?

Before the internet, buying sex toys was dirty, seedy and gross...

Now, in the world of Ann Summers, it's chic, hip and all women who appreciate pleasure are doing it. And if they're not? They should be!

It was the world of sex toys that Hubby and I recently explored when he ordered a box of them from Sexshop365. It's a VERY cool online sex toy shop with some great goodies and brilliant, quick delivery. I strongly recommend checking them out.

Now Hubby is as keen as hell on this whole slave/master relationship and he needs the toys to play the role properly. Hence his purchases online.

This is what he came up with...

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It started off with Flirt, a PVC outfit that leaves the crotch open and my boobies exposed.

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Considering I have both my nips peirced, I can understand the latter incentive... The fact that my pussy and arse are both open for business when I'm wearing this industrial getup leads me to believe that Hubby's on the brink of going through with his whole 'fucking another guy' fantasy. Why else would he want my two hotspots exposed? At the same time?

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Next on the list was something I loved the look of. A Rabbit Vibrator. Since I'm a girl who's only got a small, plastic friend, the thought of something like this to keep me entertained into the wee hours was as horny as hell.

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I mean, I'm a fan of Sex in the City, so I knew about the Rabbit. I'd just never seen one before. And damn they're cute. Like a little rubber lollipop! Apparently when they were first made in Japan, it was illegal to make sex toys that looked like... well, sex toys. So instead you got whirring rubber mushrooms and vibrating rabbits and it was all made out of strawberry flavour rubber.

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It's like a sex toy aimed for little girls - but aren't we all little girls deep inside?

Last, but not least, was the dangerous looking toy.

Hubby had bought me an enormous rubber strap on.

It's pretty fucking big - as big as he is when he's at his hardest. What Hubby intends me to do with seven inches of rubber dick I dread to think. I'm his slave, so I imagine he's not planning for me to use it on him. I guess he has more nerfarious schemes in mind and I imagine they involve some poor orafice I can plunder with this thing.

I'll tell you what, though. A snug little harness holding a big, hard cock is a pretty empowering thing for a girl. It's so big and hard! The cock has an enormous head and a veiny shaft and even a big pair of balls. It's all made out of latex or rubber that is soft and firm all at the same time, like overripe fruit. I can't stop squeezing it!

I have finally figured out Freud's penis envy. I just want to FUCK something with it.

And trust me, I'll post pictures when I do. But until then, check out the brilliant Sexshop365 and buy some sexy goodies of your own - and let me know about them!

In the Gary.

Rump.

Ass.

Derriere.

Whatever you want to call it, Hubby is obsessed with it.

Since I started this master/slave relationship, Hubby has been totally obsessed with my backside. He spanks it. He licks it. He bites it.

And, yes, he fucks it.

Now just like blowjobs were Christmas and Birthday presents before I started my slave routine, anal sex was purely the result of too much liquor and not enough resistance. I've been fucked in the arse three times in my life. The first time was at university, with an old boyfriend... The last two times are when I've been drunk as a skunk, face buried in the pillow and Hubby's taken my command of "do me" to a whole different level.

As far as I'm concerned, doing it sober would be painful, smelly and possibly ruin our sheets.

But I am a Slave and Hubby is a Master and since he was totally obsessed with it, I knew it wouldn't be long before his dick in my arse became a reality.

Tonight was the big night.

I'd been warned in advance, I have to admit. I glugged down a bottle of chardonnay in preparation and thought it would be a simple case of Hubby tying me up (he does that a lot these days) and me relaxing into a drunken stupor while eight inches of throbbing dick are shoved up my Gary Glitter.

Instead, he wanted me to work it.

The dirty fucker had me dance for him. Grind my arse against his throbbing cock while we were still dressed. He had me open up a bottle of lube (that Durex warming stuff.. ow!) and then lie back and think of England as he shoved his big, hard cock up my bum.

What I found tricky was that he wanted me on my back. On my hands and knees, arse thrust up into the air, I think I could handle it. But on my back, it seemed... awkward.

But even as I gripped the headboard for support, I got to see Hubby's face. That was worth it.

As his big dick 'popped' past my sphincter, the look on his face was priceless. Sure, it felt like I had a red hot crowbar shoved up my jacksie, but I could have come just from the look on his face.

And it was mercifully short. Just three or four thrusts and Hubby was pumping a big load of cum right up into my bowels. Normally, I complain he lasts barely minutes. This time, he was inside me for mere seconds.

But it didn't matter. The amount of pleasure I gave him almost made up for the discomfort I felt. In fact, as soon as he'd left to clean up, I flicked my bean to a quick orgasm all on my own.

Who knew I could control men with only the power of my arse?

And wasn't I meant to be the slave? I didn't realise one tight, forbidden orifice would grant me so much power over horny men.

Hubby keeps threatening to get some other guys to screw me in the arse. If I can expect the same puppy-dog devotion afterwards, perhaps I should let them!